How I Made Peace With Being A Working Mother
If you were to survey what are the worst jobs for a mother to take on, consulting would certainly be on top of that list.
Consulting, finance, medicine, law and high ranks in corporation have traditionally been frowned upon as jobs for mothers. This has a lot to do with the grueling working hours these jobs pose.
My guilt of being a working mother was only multiplied by me being in consulting as an entrepreneur in one of the toughest market conditions.
Imagine my surprise on reading the Harvard Business School study on the benefit of working mothers on their children. This got me to thinking and I realised that in my guilt of working, I was ignoring the advantages it had on my 1.5-year-old son. Below are a few positive effects my being a working mother:
My life condition is usually high: A lot of new mothers I know complained of some sort of depression or frustration. Given the number of things I now need to do in one day now, I am usually constantly full of energy. Not to mention that being able to create value at my workplace gives a sense of fulfillment that just adds to the satisfaction of being a mother. This fulfillment keeps me in a high life condition.
I manage more quality time with my son: I think my system knows that it needs to switch off from work the minute I get home. Because I don’t spend the whole day with my son, the time that I do get with him I give him a 100%. We have the most meaningful conversations, walks, reading sessions.
I feel he is more independent: Because I do not have the luxury of spending hours on my son fussing, I feel he is learning how to take care of himself quicker than I anticipated. He is learning to feed himself, clean up after himself, brush it off every time he has a fall.
I feel closer to my husband: I think this had a lot to do with how supportive he is of my decision to work. Not only that, his help in taking care of our toddler, makes me respect him a lot more than ever before.
I would never discount the advantages of being a stay at home mother and I believe too much time has been wasted in mothers judging mothers. Mothers across the world are the same, we struggle so our children will have a good life, we make sure they are safe, we make sure that they are loved. I am just at peace knowing that just because I wish to be able to create value everyday outside of the family setting as well, I don’t become a bad mother.